What to Write next?!

Try Me Not is finished on my end. I am just trying to find an editor that actually wants to edit. In the meantime, I have spent the rest of my time working on my second book, The Secret Teller. I am towards the end of the book!!! So that means I need your help picking my third book!!! Here are some ideas, just comment which one you like best and the one with the most votes will be the one I write next!!!

1. Broken Boundaries
This book is about a Native family who moves from the Rez to an all white town. This is Shayla’s senior year and she is pissed she has to leave all her friends. Her parents don’t get it either. How can they do this to her during her SENIOR year? She ends up finding a job that summer before school starts and ends up dating this cute white boy she works with. She ends up getting pregnant and keeps it a secret for as long as she can, but of course, it comes out. Her parents disown her and kick her out, she gets bullied at school for being the first one pregnant, and her boyfriend dumps her. What is she going to do, homeless with a baby on the way?

2. No title(Will take suggestions for the title)= This book is about two cousins who grew up together as best friends; Riley and Tyson. Riley’s mom left her and her dad when she was real little. It was always just her, her dad, and Tyson. Riley’s life was good; she had a great job, a best friend, and a nice guy she was talking to. Then her dad got sick and her life flipped upside down. Her dad made Tyson promise to look after her, and he did great. But what will he do when his cousin gets kidnapped? How will he find her when the police stop looking? Will he be able to keep his promise to his Uncle and save his cousin before it’s too late?

3. No title (will take suggestions for the title)= This book is about Haper, a beautiful, sweet and caring girl. She is always doing for others even for those who don’t do for her. She gets bullied a lot and always clings to her cousin who used to be so nice to her, but now has become rather mean. She is upset and alone when she is approached by an Owl who was talking to her. Wait, that couldn’t be right, animals don’t talk! The Owl told her she was special and had powers and that some very bad people were coming to find her.  She couldn’t believe what she was hearing. What powers? How was she special? What was she going to do? Would she accept her truth and find out who she really was or would she ignore it and continue living her lonely boring life?

4. No title (will take suggestions for the title)= This book is about a brother who’s sister vanishes. The police think she’s just a runaway teen, but her brother will stop at nothing to find her. After months of looking under every rock, he gets a letter with a clue as to what happened to his sister. In the letter, it talks about human trafficking and how if he doesn’t find her fast, she will be sold to someone in another country. He tries to go to the police, but they think he’s lost it. So it’s up to him to save his sister before she’s lost forever. How in the hell will he find her when he’s already looked everywhere? He didn’t think human trafficking was a real thing. What was he really up against? 

 

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Why isn’t it enough?

If you’ve been following my blog at all, you’ve been made aware of my health issues. If you haven’t, a quick back story. I have PCOS and a thyroid issue. I am also on the weight loss journey. And that my friends, is why I am making this entry.

Now, I’m comfortable enough with yall to be completely transparent on some things. I will not lie or sugar coat ANYTHING. I will be open and honest about my feelings no matter bad it might make me look or what people will think.

Continuing on… I have been on medication to help my PCOS and my thyroid and it seems to be doing what it’s supposed to. I have lost 9 pounds so far. And that is with absolutely no working out or eating healthy. At first, it was the pain I was in that would prevent me from working out. Excuse? Probably.  Now, it’s the lack of motivation. So I looked at myself in the mirror and told myself to get my shit together and work out. I started to drink more water and watch my portion control. I felt good.

I went back to the doctor and this time I asked him about how much weight does he think I need to lose to get pregnant. Now when the number rolled off his lips, into the air, and SLAPPED ME IN THE FACE, I couldn’t do anything but nod my head and say “okay”. He told me he feels I need to lose 160 pounds in order to get pregnant. 160 pounds is A LOT; that’s a whole other person!!! I felt… humiliated. Basically, I’m two people.

Before my visit, I was excited because I finally mustered up the courage to ask him about weight loss. After my visit, I was hopeless, devastated, broken. I felt humiliated because how could I be so big. How could I let myself go? How come I hadn’t noticed it myself? I felt like everyone around me who would tell me I wasn’t fat, was lying to me so they wouldn’t hurt my feelings. (I mean, I couldn’t blame them for that because 1. telling someone you love that they are fat is MEAN AS HELL. and 2. I’d probably want to fight them).

I kept telling myself “there was no way I could lose that much weight. If I did, it would be too late and my eggs would be fried.” I was depressed again. I want a baby SO bad, yall; SO BAD. So why isn’t that enough to kick my ass in gear!?

The answer to that question is because of my mindset. People kept telling me to break the number down into smaller goals and work from there. But I couldn’t. I couldn’t get past the big 160 staring me in the face and haunting my dreams. I couldn’t will myself into working out no matter what I tried. I was getting upset becauseI wasn’t able to motivate myself. I was starting to hate myself.

I broke down and cried my eyes out to my boyfriend. He told me I was thinking about it the wrong way and that it was POSSIBLE for me to lose weight. We had a great talk that night and the next day I woke up motivated!!! I jumped rope for ten minutes and I was on top of the world. I felt amazing all day long. I was sore as hell, but guys, I DID IT!! I actually did it. I jumped rope for three days in a row for ten minutes and one day for 15! I couldn’t believe it. Then my period happened and the back pain was back bad. So I’ve taken some time to wait until she leaves and I’m gonna get right back at it!

I struggle, I fail over and over. BUT I WILL NEVER GIVE UP…and neither should you. Comment your struggles, your success, your tips, ANYTHING. Let’s do this together because I need all the help and support I can get!!!

In the Works

Have you ever felt like no matter how many times you said something, or how loud you yelled, you weren’t heard?? You will be happy to know, you aren’t alone. I actually feel like this quite often. It doesn’t have to be anything serious even. It could be something simple, I still feel like nobody is listening.

Am I dreaming? Am I just thinking this and not actually saying it? Am I being loud enough? Am I invisible?

The truth is: I’m not dreaming. I am actually saying it. I’m am being loud. And finally, I am NOT  invisible. People are just simpled minded and only want to see/hear their truth because it is easier to deal with than the REAL truth.

Well guess what, buttercup? I’m about to make a LOT of people very, very uncomfortable. The gloves are coming off. I’m working on a blog post that is gonna knock yall’s socks off. It might take awhile for me to get it ready, but when I do….boy, yall not gonna know what happened! =)

Stay tuned for some greatness 😉